Hi. You guys know me. I don’t complain regularly about anything. Indulge me for a minute, would ya? I am a decade-plus resident of the city of St. Louis. It doesn’t matter what neighborhood I live in. No one deserves to live in abject FILTH.
Yes, ladies and gentleman, that is a shower curtain. It’s covering up someone’s bathroom garbage wastebasket, which is overflowing with used feminine hygiene products. BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE!
I know we lost some dumpsters when the recycling bins came in, but really? You think this is awesome? THIS IS HOW YOU GET ANTS. AND RATS.
This is the THIRD TIME I’ve had to clean up the alley behind our house this winter. However, it’s the first time I’ve done it during the day. Let’s talk, City of St. Louis. While I was cleaning the alley behind my house? No less than four of my neighbors came out to watch. And KVETCH about the “suspicious” new neighbors they believe is behind all this mess. Bitches, if I’m cleaning, you better be helping, or just stay in your gottdamned house. I know by your gestures and sighs and winces that you’re trying really hard not to say something outright racist, and I almost respect you for that, I really do. You’re not frickin’ helping. Literally.
You’re going to be passive aggressive about our new recycling bins by piling up cardboard and bottles on the mother flipping ground NEXT to the bin? Really? How’s that working out for you?? I don’t have little kids that ride bikes in the alley, but I know YOU do! Imagine yourself watching helplessly while a nurse fishes giant shards of beer bottle out of your babies’ precious skin! Cuz that’s what’s going to happen if you don’t take some GOTTDAMNED RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR ACTIONS!
AS FOR YOU, ST. LOUIS CITY POLICE DEPARTMENT!
Officer whoever you were, when a giant, sweating, red-faced, crying woman is throwing bio-hazardous waste into lawn bags in the alley and you drive past and wave without stopping? NOT COOL!! What the hell was that about??
And finally, Dear Renter who all the immigrants on the block hate because she is a person of color and a renter: IF YOU’RE GONNA MAKE ME PICK UP YOUR USED MAXI PADS FROM BEHIND MY GOTTDAMNED HOUSE (I had gloves on, but still, DAMN), HAVE THE GOTTDAMNED DECENCY TO SHRED YOUR GOTTDAMNED MAIL SO I DON’T KNOW FOR SURE YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY. I defended you to all our pissed off neighbors when you moved in. I was made physically ill that I was surrounded by a bunch of bigoted jerks, and I wept, seriously. Today, I wept because I HAD TO PICK UP YOUR USED TAMPONS. I’m not generally a hateful person, but it’s going to take a long time before I move on from that. I know your name, I know your LANDLORDS’ names, and I am PISSED.